Questionably Fabulous

While in Los Angels last week we were lucky enough to shack up with some friends of ours who generously blew up one of the more comfortable air mattresses and fed us some yummy grub.

Since they were going out of town on Friday, they gave us a key and the garage clicker thing and told us to make ourselves comfy once they left if (and only if) we did one thing in return. They wanted us to find out if their neighbors were filming porn next door.

Yea, and they were serious.

Now, I will admit, I love figuring out a mystery as much as the next guy… but um, really? Find out if there was porn going on? Come on!

Bryan and I did some recon work… Here were the facts: 

• Loud music is always being played.
• There are bright lights in there.
• There was a topless lady in the hot tub a few nights ago making out with one guy while two others were watching. (Side note, our friends have no idea if those four people even live in the apartment next to them.)

Some ideas as to how we were going to figure this out:

• Simply knock on the door and say, “Hi, I’m staying with my friends who live next door to you and they were wondering if you’re filming porn in here.” We did not do this for fear of being escorted out of the building. And since we don’t live there and our friends were not there to vouch for us, we could be accused of breaking in and harassing the tenets.
• Bryan and I could have loud sex one day or night and then knock on their door for a condom, pretend we were filming porn and strike up an industry conversation. We decided not to do this option as sex on an air mattress no matter how wonderful it is, is not exactly porn start like behavior.
• Put a condom on the door mat, knock on the door and run before they answer it, see if they take it and use it. Do I need to explain why we didn’t do this one?
• Bryan could knock on the door while I crouch down out of eye site. While he is making polite small talk with whoever answers, I could sneak in and get a peep. We didn’t go this route either, I mean, WTF would I do when I got in there? Make popcorn and watch? I’d get thrown out or thrown in, either way I wasn’t game. And I wasn’t going to let Bryan do it either.

What we ended up doing is really not exciting. Bryan leaned over the balcony far enough to catch a glimpse of what was going on… Painting. So anti-climactic. (Get it? LOL)